Reviewed: Feb. 3, 2023

Genre: Comedy/Thriller

5/10🐻

(SPOILERS FOR COCAINE BEAR)

Cocaine Bear is a movie that follows a bunch of characters, such as a mother, a police officer, and drug dealers, in the woods and they get attacked or otherwise encounter a cocaine-fueled bear. This concept came from a true story where a bear died from overdosing on cocaine it found in the woods. It’s doing well at the box office, having earned $28.7 million since its release on Feb. 24. I have very few good things to say about this movie, however. It is painfully average at best, and at worst a waste of time. At least I can say it’s a movie. The gore and action scenes, such as the ambulance scene, are well-shot and use good effects instead of gushing CGI blood. Speaking of CGI, I personally didn’t have a problem with the look of the actual bear. It isn’t the worst thing CGI has produced in the 21st century, but it’s bearable, no pun intended. But that’s all the good things about this movie; the bad stuff is painfully average. None of the characters are memorable except maybe the police chief, but even then I can’t remember his name. My biggest problem with this movie is that no one is shown to have any consequences for their actions. The little girl and boy literally do hardcore drugs in this movie and there are no repercussions other than the mother saying, “well you are grounded,” to her daughter, the little girl. The boy is hinted at having a neglectful or abusive father, but it’s not even expanded on with the theme of the movie. I’d argue the theme of Cocaine Bear is family. People could argue each character has a different theme for their journey, but if there is one it gets immediately slammed by comedy or some slap-stick trope. The liar-revealed trope at the ladder end of the movie made me literally scoff at how utterly out of nowhere it was. There was no hint, sign, or anything else alluding to the fact the girl officer knew the “big bad” of the movie. The plot moved too fast and it didn’t tie anyone together until the end when everyone, who did survive, got in their cars and drove off. The humor was…okay. I laughed a few times during the experience, but most of it was during the stand-off at the gazebo. This movie at least is a movie. It made me feel something, but it’s not the good kind of something. The movie got its appeal because of the premise and its mediocrity is painfully average.